Vampire Repellant

25.02.2015

Little known fact about the Nicoya peninsula, our home for the next three days - it's home to the most exotic wildlife anywhere in Costa Rica - vampires! Of course, nobody has told us that nor have we verified that fact on the internet, but it was quite obvious to us tonight, since that was the only possible way of explaining our dinner at Casa Esmeralda, a meal that was the equivalent of a Vampire Weapon of Mass Destruction! We may both love garlic, but even we have limits!

It was a truly sad thing, because Casa Esmeralda is actually very highly-rated on Tripadvisor, and our food was quite well-prepared ... but the garlic ... it was just mind-boggling, the amount that the chef had used on the garlic bread and fish. You could almost see a first-time chef using that much of the stuff, but how could a chef that had the skill to turn out a beatifully-caramelized and perfectly-cooked fish filet, think that much garlic would be good? It wasn't only the amount of garlic, but the fact that it was RAW garlic, obliterating the dish with a spicy horseradish-like feel.

It was truly sad, as there must have been at least four or five cloves worth of minced garlic on the fish alone, which rendered the meal more vampire repellant than anything edible. At first glance, I was shocked at the amount of garlic atop of the filet, but shrugged my shoulders and dug in, assuming that the chef knew what they were doing. After a few bites, however, I absolutely had to scrap off the garlic, at least three cloves worth, if not more. Perhaps the saving graces were the delicious crispy fries and decent vegetables for sides, that were somewhat helpful in diluting the pungent garlic. In hindsight, I should've requested a side dish of a tongue scraper!

It was baffling, as our other main dish of seafood pasta with avocado was actually very tasty, not polluted with garlic, and full of chunks of rich avocado and fresh seafood, all placed atop some al dente pasta. How do you go from that dish to this garlic abomination??!?!? It defies logic! So, borrowing some deductive reasoning from one of the greatest minds ever, Mr. Spock, we deduced that such heavy-handed use of garlic must be to repel vampires. Because if you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth. Am I right? Is Spock right? Of course!

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